How To Be a CaRIOca

In my another life, when I used to live in Brazil, I thought I knew everything about my (then) country. I used to think people had a western lifestyle (my husband says it is not), that we had the last technology available (hahaha!) and sunny-all-the-time weather was boring. Yes, I was an innocent girl. I was also permanently irritaded with some Brazilian habits and cultural traces.
When my husband - then a Dutch flirt I had met in Amsterdam - arrived in Brazil in July 1998 he had by then studied this whole book I had sent to him by mail:
How to be a CaRIOca - The Alternativa Guide for the Tourist in Rio, from Prsicilla Ann Goslin and illustrations by Carlos Carneiro.
He gave me as a present The UnDutchables (brilliant book) announcing that he was humiliated by what the authors had said about the Dutch and that I should be proud about what was in How to Be a CaRIOca . Well, I confess I felt myself actually a bit ridicularized by the book - but not humiliated.

Every trip I have made to Brazil I have spotted this book at bookstores at ariport. It is a permanent success. Sometimes I do read it again and again just for a laugh. It is full of jokes and has at the end of the book a true or false test "Your Carioca I.Q." to check your level of cariocaness . The last chapter has tips about what to do in case you want to stay (forever ?) in Rio.
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Bellow, an excerpt:

"... IF you should decide to indulge in a feijoada, be sure that you have the rest of your day free. Since the aftermath of eating a feijoada may be very dangerous, the following post-feijoada precautionary measures should be observed:
* Do not wear tight pants.
* Do not go out to play soccer.
*Do not operate heavy machinery.
*Do not have sex, wild or otherwise.

Acceptable options of things to do after eating a feijoada are:
* Lie in a hammock on the veranda or under a tree with your eyes closed, listening to the chirping of the birds.
* Extend yourself on a soft, comfortabel sofa while listening to a Milton Nascimento tape with the air-conditioner at full blast. " (page 66 - Lesson 9: Eating Out in Rio)
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"Book written by gringa which teaches tourists how to pass as Cariocas leads the pack of new books... Aimed primarily at gringos who want to avoid humiliating experiences... the most perfect translation of carioques." O DIA

" A sociological treatment about Rio de Janeiro has just been published... No maps, no tourist routes. Instead, a commentary about the most incoherent city in the Mily Way galaxy ... A best seller..." O GLOBO

"How to be a Carioca... is much a compendium of tongue-in-cheek observations about her adopted hometown as it is a handbook for the newcomer." TIME magazine

Nesse post eu indico o livro "How To Be a CaRIOca" para quem quer uma obra muito bem humorada sobre a vida na cidade mais incoerente da Via Lactea. Eu dou molinho aqui pra voces traduzindo tudo pro portuga... mas tentem ler o post acima em inglês ! Quanto mais exposição a língua, mais tomamos familiaridade com ela. Força na peruca e boa sorte !